My darling son was sitting at breakfast this morning not so quietly eating his cottage cheese. I popped a cinnamon raisin bagel into the toaster for him and was checking email at our kitchen computer when he turns to me and says:

J: "Get off your chair and get my toast"

Me: "Excuse ME??"

J: "Please"

Me: "Your bagel isn't ready until the toaster beeps, please reword that request in a nicer way"

Toaster: "Beep"

J: "Now get me my toast?"